Society & Culture

Child Support & the non custodial parent.

Society & Culture

Posted by: Ralphy

23rd Nov 2010 08:54am

Why is it that when paying child support that the "non custodial parent" has no rights? Our "GROSS" pay is what the % is taken from not the net. So regardless of any mortgages, car payments, loans etc we have or even how much we pay in tax, they take it from the GROSS.... yet they do not take into account if the Ex is re married, their partner earns loads of money, they don't have to account for the child support as to where it is going. My Ex has managed to buy a new car, go overseas on holidays and all that when i struggled to put food on the table for myself. Child support is meant to be one half of what it takes to maintain a child, the "custodial" parent should be made to show receipts for monies spent on the children at tax time to justify the amount of money being paid. Particularly when that person removes the children against a court order and there is nothing that can be done about it unless you take them to court. It is near on impossible to afford to pay for a lawyer to take them to court as that cost thousands which you don't have due to the amount of child support you pay. It is a vicious circle indeed. I know not all "custodial" ex's are like this but there needs to be stringent rules and assistance for non custodial parents when these type of things happen. After all they are quite happy to take the money, they should allow us to see our children. Perhaps the percentage should be asset based? on both non custodial and custodial. Why should the non custodial parent live in squallor, never having the opportunity to afford to own a house when the custodial parent can work, get child support and have a partner who earns lots of money can afford to buy what they want? What of the poor kids who miss out on seeing their other parent through choices made for them by your ex?


blondie72
  • 28th Nov 2010 10:18am

I agree entirely with all you have said here Ralphy and my heart goes out to you. Firstly I must say I was a single Mum of 1 with a drop kick Ex who never payed maintenance so I have not been in your situation but my best friend and her new husband have and are still currently in the exact same situation as you. Largely, you can thank the drop kick fathers/mothers who shirk their responsibilities (such as my ex) for causing the Government to lump all non custodial parents into the same category.

In my friends case her new husband had two kids to his Ex wife, ex wife got everything in the divorce - house, cars, furniture, the lot and then refused to let him see the kids because he had found someone new. Meanwhile, she meets and marries a new husband and together they open up a business - a business that they purposely run at a loss and they pay themselves a wage.

He now has tow little children as well to my friend, both under 6yo and a mortgage, car loan, utlities, rates, and school fees etc... to pay for as well but CS don't care less that some weeks he is flat out putting food on the table and his Ex is living the life of a millionaire!

He doesn't begrudge paying his CS but what he begrudges is that he almost always has to work overtime to stay afloat and when he does the taxman gets some and so does CS (the EX)........its hardly worth getting a higher paying job or doing overtime only for the taxman & the EX to get most of it.

At present he is looking into paying her out - apparently CS has informed him that he can pay her out - so now he is hoping and praying he can borrow the $50,000 it will take to pay her out so he can get a better job and work a heap more overtime. The way I see it, it will be worth to get her out of his life after the way she has treated him and turned his kids against him.

CS need to treat each case individually (means test) and like you said - make the custodial parent provide proof that the CS money is going to the kids and down the necks of poker machines or up the arms of junkies or anywhere it shouldn't be going!


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